Last Sunday I actually wanted to run. I am positive that is not a feeling I have ever had before. I have wanted to run to something, away from something, behind something - you get the picture- but never have I wanted to run for the simple reason of just running to run.
I am a fat girl, a size 16. Please understand I use the word fat for what it is. A descriptive word. I am not offended by a mere adjective. Twenty years ago that word crushed me, but it doesn't anymore. Ask any toddler with the new-found skill to innocently describe people as they are. I am fat, not chunky, fluffy, squishy (well I am a little of that! Ha!) or any of the other "less offensive" adjectives. I don't get upset about words like that anymore. I am who I am.
That being said, I have always thought that I could not run. I have never been one to "run for fun." That phrase doesn't even make sense. I have never believed that those words should ever be used together.
Society and media have shown me since I was young that fat people aren't supposed to run. Fat people aren't supposed to do a lot of things. Fat people aren't supposed to exercise in public. They are not supposed to eat unhealthy foods in public. They are not really supposed to eat in public at all. Fat people aren't supposed to wear clothes that are very revealing.
Fat girls are not supposed to wear string bikinis (just kidding! I don't think I should wear string bikinis either- just checking to see if you're paying attention 😁) Fat people aren't supposed to do so many things. Especially running.
But here I am on day 12 of the 30 day running streak challenge. Society has always taught me that I am not supposed to run. Maybe it's because I've always been overweight. Maybe it's because I was blessed by becoming top-heavy at the age of 12. Maybe it's because I've never had the self-confidence due to being overweight and the cruelty of others that comes with that. Maybe it's because I developed excruciating back pain at 27 and had back surgery at 30. Don't get me wrong; I'm not unhealthy but I'm definitely not fit.
Yet after watching a co-worker and other friends on social media, I decided I could run a mile every day for 30 days, or at least work up to that. Guess what happened! On day 8 I was able to jog one mile without stopping. Me! The one who fell and severely sprained her ankle a few years ago. The same one who has neuropathy in the right leg from years of a pinched sciatic nerve. Me- the one who has never been thin- the one who is a size 16. Me- who I can now call a runner.
I have begun to look forward to my run each day. I feel like the personal development that my home- based business wants me to do to make myself a better version of me is giving me strength. I am better able to use negative energy as fuel toward pursuing a positive goal. EHT has cleared my brain fog. I have always been one who has difficulty staying on task or topic. Since I began taking EHT about 5 months ago, my brain has become better organized. It's a drug free supplement that contains a caffeine-free molecule from coffee. BSCG certified drug free, and discovered in Princeton labs by Dr. Stock. Watch a 2 minute video here that explains the science: EHT- Anti-Aging for the Brain It has helped me focus on and stick to a goal. I have been able to quiet that inner voice of doubt that always tells me I will never reach my goal. My thinking comes from that Slight Edge philosophy that little things we do every day seem insignificant, but over time they all add up.
This has not been an easy road so far. The first four days of the challenge I was barely able to descend or climb stairs. I did it anyway and avoided the elevator.
I have been ill the last few days. Throbbing headache, fever, and ear pain accompanied the general feeling of malaise. I ran anyway, or did what I could, still completing at least a mile. I am not even halfway there yet. I hear thunder outside as I type. Bring on the challenge!
How do you feel about running?
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